9/9/99

Was it really 10 fucking years ago today?

wow... so much shit happened that day that affects my life even to this day... all be it all mostly indirectly.

Probably biggest is this is the 10 year mark of when I started high school. I have ranted about high school a bit in here, and while the negatives still stand, I have noticed more than a few positives. Most of it really has nothing to do with high school at all, but more or less events that happened within those "lauded" 4 years. My first kiss, my first love, my best friend, the summer of 2001, the birth of my creative spark, my first film... all of these things happened while I was in high school. While I still detest the institution of high school and many of the people I went there with, I can't look back at those 4 years in complete disgust. Some of the best and happiest moments of my life came around in that time, and the fact that it all began 10 years ago now makes me look back in disbelief that this much time has passed already.

The next is an event I talked about in an entry almost exactly 2 years ago: when the MTV Music Video Music Awards gave its Video of the Year award to Lauren Hill's "Doo Wop (That Thing)" over Korn's "Freak on a Leash", which was also the heavy favorite to win. At the time, it felt like such an injustice that I literally slammed my TV into a wall. I talked about this heavily before as I said, but this, coupled with the recent creation of Fixer, was what started me to think about how I would make music videos. This, for all intents and purposes, was one of the events that lead me to where I am now.

The other is an event that affects another big part of me, the gamer. One of my fave systems of all time was released, the Dreamcast. That was a huge moment for gaming, as many of you can tell by going to just about any videogame website today, as most are filled with Dreamcast retrospectives. The system was the birth of the modern gaming era, and as much as its in vogue to say the 8-bit and 16-bit eras were the best, I am glad to be living in the modern era of gaming. Granted, gaming was in the shits from 2005 - mid-2007, but damn did it strike back with a-fucking-vengeance in mid-2007! It hasn't let down yet either, 2 years later! Anyway, Dreamcast also has the nefarious distinction of being the last hurrah for Sonic... before he became a fetish. Sonic Adventure 1 and 2 we're some of the best Sonic games ever made, and unfortunately the last time he was taken seriously. After that, the fur fags and shitty fanfic writers got ahold of him, making him more popular than ever... and turning him into a sweaty obese 14-year-old's fangasm of vaginal juices and fuzz.

Last is something that may be slightly over-looked. But... according to the band, D'espairsRay formed today, 10 years ago. D-Ray is a band, that like oh so many these days, I have a love/hate relationship with, starting off as innovative metal heads, then recently morphing into run-of-the-mill uninspired pop-rock. However, I do give alot of credit to D-ray for shaping the modern wave of VK. They took it from being more of an arena rock phenomena to a more seedy, dark, underground, and for the most part, metal experience. This more disturbing, almost cultish take on VK was what really drew me into the genre. 5 years ago, D-Ray's influence seem so great on the indies VK scene that it really felt for a while, that many young VK bands were really trying to be like D-Ray, borrowing heavily from their look and sound. While I do not really agree with what they are doing now, their influence on the current generation of VK cannot be denied. How the fuck is the band 10 years old already!?

Its been a long 10 years... that went by in an instant, and it all began on 9/9/99... a day that had infinite influence on the next 10 years to come.

-Roger

Back when I first started keeping a blog, I used to log my dreams all of the time. After a while though, I all but stopped. On occasion, if I have a particularly strong dream, I will log it, and this is one such occasion. I received some startling news (I won't say, but it wasn't about any of our clients, but it could potentially affect TR).

As usually, it was a multi-sectioned dream that transitioned from one set piece to another without explanation or meaning, but the last set piece is the one I am writing about.

I found myself with a backpack filled with some of my belongings; and I'm walking onto familiar ground, Millersville University, where I went to college. The campus is buzzing. It's the first day of not classes, but Student Move-In Day. I was going to live on campus this semester.

In real life, all through out college, I commuted from my home 45 minutes away every day for class. I was always a part-time student as I couldn't afford to go full time, and even though I went 4 years, I didn't graduate. I was forced to drop out for two reasons. One was the I went flat broke. The other I'll get to later.

Back to the dream, I remember looking up online who I would be rooming with. I recognized the guy. He was a guy that I played football with in highschool who I didn't particularly care for, but when I got into college, he was startlingly friendly to me. The other was a girl I never heard of. Maybe it was a co-ed dorm?

I was barely ever in the dorms when I was in school. Because of the kinda person I am, and the commuting I had to do, I really missed out on the social aspect of college. I think I went to... 2 parties the entire time? And that's only because Craig from Bad Transitions threw them. Infact, the BT guys where the extent of my social life in college. Going back to their places, grabbing food (most of the time at Waffle House, Jack's... or if we were really fuckin starving The Sugarbowl) playing videogames up the wazoo, just hanging and chatting for hours on end... Yup. They were my boys. I had a spark of a social life my sophomore year, but it died all but completely the next year. Why? I'm just not a social butterfly I guess.

Back to the dream, the dorm was bustling with life. I remember readjusting my backpack on my arm, and looking at the paper, trying to find my new home for the next few months. I've never lived outside of somewhere I haven't known since I was a baby, so this was really an adventure for me. I remember finding my room, and opening it up. The first thing that took me back was that the place was fucken huge! It was a full fledged apartment! Full sized living room, kitchen, and 3 bedrooms. I remember the girl and a friend of her's were in the living room watching TV when I walked in. They were really friendly and greeted me, and seemed to know this was my first time living away from home. I remember being gracious, but being anxious to get settled. I figured since I was the new guy, I would get the small shit room that's in every apartment, and I didn't mind that. I'm not a guy with great needs. I remember peering into the rooms, looking for the unfurnished one (knowing that one would be mine). However, not only was every bedroom fully furnished, but 2 times the size of my bedroom here in Ocean City! I turned to the girl and said "WTF is with this? What happened to the coffins that kids used to live in?". She explained that while I was away, state law changed and deemed those kinds of dorm rooms INHUMANE!!!

I tossed my things on my bed and was just like "wow", and walked back into the living room where two random guys who I assumed were friends of the girl were playing Rock Band. they only had one guitar and a drum kit, but were being pretty cool and offered me a chance. One guy heard that I was into drumming and started talking to me like I was a pro, and I had to explain to him that I sucked and was only just learning at my leisure. We started chatting about different drum kits when I started to get hungry. We headed down to the cafeteria as a group. I remember feeling really happy. My rommies seemed like cool people, everyone was really friendly, my dorm was a fucking knock out, and the biggest point for me, I came back to college at an age where I was still young enough to fit in. I started thinking about getting my classes squared away after this food break (I guess I didn't have them scheduled yet?) and being ecstatic about being able to take up Japanese again. We walk into the cafeteria... then the second reason why I'm not in college bites me square in my fucken ass.

From one of the food lines I see Gothique Prince Ken, then SiSeN, then several other member's of BLOOD's touring entourage (yes, they are in full costume btw). I walk up to them and ask them what the hell they are doing there. I knew they were in the country, but why were they on campus? Ken tells me they wanted to see me, and I tell my new friends I'll catch up with them as I take the guys up to the dorm room. On the way up, I notice Kiwamu's not there. I ask where he is, and Ken says "Roger... I have some really grave news".

"What is he dead?"

"Well..."

"Holy shit dude is he fucking dead???!!!"

"Um... well no... but he killed someone"

"WHAT" (In my mind I was thinking it was only a matter of time)

"Well, we were vacationing here and doing some hiking, and Kiwamu pushed a kid off of a cliff"

"Oh Jesus Christ, a kid..."

"Yeah... and the kid was the son of another band's drummer" (A band I am actually trying to sign to Tainted Reality in real life)

"Oh fucking God" was the only thing that kept running through my head. I took them up to the dorm while I tried to figure out what to do. When I got in, the guy I didn't like too much was being as overly friendly as I remember him being, and had a few of his friends in the living room. I just brushed them off and said these guys where clients of mine and were gonna stay in my room a bit. I then went outside and tried to clear my head.

WTF, Kiwamu just killed a kid? And the son of a member of another band I'm trying to sign? This kept running through my mind as neighbors were trying to welcome me to the dorm, some even giving me chocolates. I leaned against a wall and slid down into a sitting position. I was fuckin dumbfounded. Then my cell rings. I pick it up, and it's Kiwamu. He's hysterical. I'm having it out with him, and he told me it was an accident. Knowing Kiwamu, if he meant to kill the kid, he would be screaming about how much the kid deserved it. After we talk a little while, he asks me to bail him from jail. I say ok and ask him where he's at. I wake up soon after.

I honestly dunno what this means for me. I know I want to finish up college. It is a big loose end in my life. However, I really just can't afford it. My grandfather says he will give me the money to go back, but he is so far in debt that had to sell my home of 19 years to recover from it (the debt accumulated from my grandmother's final few years in a nursing home due to Alzheimers). And then there's TR. Ever since leaving, TR has really started to take off and we have had many major major successes now that I can focus on it full time without interference from college. And I really don't see TR as a burden either. So I have no idea why in this dream, it was portrayed in such a negative light. One thing is clear and always has been clear to me. I really do wanna go back and finish what I started. How and when is going to be a mystery for a long time though.

What do you think this dream meant?

-Roger

-Roger

I watch the waves crash upon the shore alone
as my tragedy repeats eternally, over and over

In the dark sky, a thousand stars softly envelop me

Even the dreams we dreamed together now vanish
even the wind we felt together is changing

The melody I hear within this night pours out like my tears

I'm too scared since I lost all of you
Now the futures out of my sight

and all of the warmth that I once felt

If I met you somewhere once again,
Could I tell you all of my eternal love

My voice crying out to the sky does not reach you

How many nights must I suffer alone...

Even now you are still in my heart Please end this pain...

-Fu~ki... coz I can't find the words myself

-Roger

-Roger

Here we go.... one last time... wish us luck.

-Roger

Ok, you guys have been waiting for this for a wile. You all know since I saw girugamesh at JRR they have been one of my most loved bands, and released what I consider to be one of the best J-Rock albums I've ever heard in their self-titled album. However, with their newest release, Music, they have changed things up considerably. They have added industrial style keyboards ala-old school D-Ray, but more noticeably, turn tables and rapping. So, with people knowing how much I love girugamesh, as well as bands with similar styles to the new album such as Linkin Park and Rage Against The Machine; but detest theGazette for going in that direction, people have been asking my opinion constantly since the album's release. Well, here it is. In short: It's fucking terrible.

This is J-Rock's St. Anger in every conceivable way. A well established band with a well refined sound decided to conform to what was popular at the time and overly simplify things and add elements that are just not them. For Metallica, they conformed to a more nu metal sound. For girugamesh, they went total rap metal on us, which is likely the most annoying genre of music out there (More so than boy bands). Granted, there are always exceptions to the rule. My exceptions being, as mentioned before, Linkin Park and Rage. However, 2 bands does not a genre make, especially when its littered by POD's, Papa Roaches, Limp Bizkits, and (most annoying of all) Crazy Towns. Linkin Park and Rage did something that these guys didn't do. I still to this day can't quite put my finger on it. However, I think it's because they put melody at the forefront. For them, the rapping complimented the music, not dominated it. You will not find this anywhere in Music.

Almost all elements of the music are made to emphasize the new hip-hop influenced style. The songs, while featuring traditional Satoshi screaming that I've come to love, eventually break down into rap stanzas and pre-choruses, lame, uninspired turntables (definitely NOT taking a page from Joe Hahn) annoyingly litter the songs, and the biggest sin of all, one of the biggest rap metal staples, turning Nii's guitar into a percussion instrument. There's just no melody from the band, anywhere. The turntables are especially annoying in that they are a constant in the album. They add nothing to them music. They are just there. They are absolutely useless. Take them completely out, and the songs might sound a bit better. It's like the band is shoving it in your face saying "OOO! LOOK AT THIS! WE HAVE TURNTABLES!! SEE! SEEE!!!!!???? WE CAN DO IT FOR 20 MINUTES, WATCH!!". The only taste of true musical element we get is in the form of the now, more dominate, keyboards. This element I don't mind as much as many bands use this to great effect (D`espairsRay, Suicide Ali, BLOOD), and there are some places where they implement them very well. However, it's not enough to save this.

The writing is just bad. Very bad. All of the songs boil down to a garbled, disjointed mess. From the very first song this is apparent. It starts out like its gonna rock (ala St. Anger again), but then the "ZOMG LOOK" turntables kick in and I cringe a bit. But then it goes back into girugamesh mode, and its cool... for 10 second until the rapping pre-chorus starts. Satoshi's rapping isn't particularly good either. It sounds like a cross between Till Lindemann and Dikembe Mutombo. Then... you get launched into this High and Mighty Color chorus! A majority of the songs follow this format. They start out begging me to like them, but as they progress, very gradually commit seppuku. FREAKS is the biggest example of this. It wants me to break someone's skull. It begs for blood. Exactly what I want in my metal, especially with its chorus. But... outta no where, you get a drum and bass break down, and the stride of the song is completely destroyed by a rap-off bridge. If this song would have launched into a high tempo, guitar frenzy, holy shit it would have been amazing. It could have rivaled Bouzenjishisu. Alas, all we could do is dream now.

Other than the keyboards, the only other saving grace of this album is its production. It SOUNDS fantastic. It's pristine and clear. The bass is crisp and amped up considerably from their previous work. IF only 13's Reborn could have sounded this good. I am literally begging Danger Cure to remaster that album.

There is also a personal reason why I consider this J-Rock's St. Anger. St. Anger came at a time where American music was all but dead to me, and my one saving grace let me down. In this calendar year, there has not been a single J-Rock full length album that I could say was amazing with the exception of BLOOD's The Reaper Behind Me. That was the album BLOOD was born to do, and they delivered with flying colors. It was a fucking masterpiece of goth rock. I did not get that from anyone else this year. Yeah, we had a few good mini-albums here and there, and some excellent singles (Ageha, Stigmata, Glass Skin) but albums have been a total let down. This album totally drove this notion home. I have been very very disappointed in J-Rock this year. What is sad is that this is a year where both Metallica and AC/DC have released their best albums in 20 years, DevilDriver's new album is jaw-dropping awesome, and even a joke band like Dethklok wrote one amazing piece of metal. I haven't listened to UROBOROS yet, but I hear it's pretty much what you'd expect from Deg right now.

I've never had a problem when bands change their sounds. When Metallica went hard rock in Load, it rocked. When Kagrra, stopped rocking in favor for ballads, I appreciated it. When MUCC said it was pop-rock time, they did it so well that I consider Gokusai one of their best. Even though D-Ray's new pop-rock sound bothers me a bit, they are still doing it well enough that I can call Kamikaze and Brilliant good songs. Not to mention, Deg going completely metal was one of the greatest musical flip-flops since Pantera. However, when the transition isn't done well (theGazette going rap-metal, Deathgaze not making any use of the word "death" in their name at all), it has disastrous results to me. I'm all about a band changing themselves for the sake of musical progression, but it needs to be done well. Yes, I grew out of rap metal almost a decade ago, but I still have an open mind enough to give one of my most beloved bands a chance when I found out they went that route. But they failed. Miserably failed. One can only hope they take the more industrial elements from this and focus on that for their next outing, because THAT would be interesting. One can only hope. Until then, I will applaud them for making one of my favorite albums ever, and try to forget that less than a year later, they also released one of the worst.

-Roger

Ya know when you were a kid, and you thought quarters were amazing, $5 was alot of money, and $50 meant you were rich? Back then, money was tangible. You held it. You were careful with it. It had value. Today, I realized money isn't that anymore. It's just a bunch of numbers on a computer screen. In order to do or get things, I need the right set of numbers, not the paper or shiny metal from old days. I do still see those once in a while, but these days I just put them in the busy, clean building that is a few blocks from my home to get turned into more numbers.

I keep trying to tell myself I haven't changed at all since the time that money was an actual object to me, but the fact that something so simple as currency has an almost completely different connotation to me makes me think otherwise.

This is both an exciting and scary time for me. All of this season's tours are done, and I'm looking forward to restructuring TR and working more on my manga. But at the same time, the future is a clean slate again. A year ago, it was a bleak clean slate because I was so far in debt. Now that I am out of debt, and actually have a few dollars, I can do some ambitious things with TR... but what? Save the money for more tours? Print more merchandise? Finally take that trip to Japan? Or something crazy; completely out of left field? I dunno.

I'm really afraid of fucking up. Putting the money in the wrong place, not filling out taxes right, making a bad investment, or even just generally saying or doing something stupid that could fuck everything up. The other thing is that its not just me anymore... its a whole cast of characters. Musicians, artists, ambitious kids, business men, dreamers... they are all part of TR now. In one way or another, they are counting on me, and I wanna do what I can to make their hopes, dreams, and goals come to light.

I hope I don't fuck up.

-Roger

So, I am an avid viewer of the content over at Screwattack.com. Recently, they had a top 10 list for the best Genesis games of all time. After it though, they prompted fans to chime in on their next top 10 list, something near and dear to my heart: video game sonsg. As some of you know, my first radio show (The Temple of Sephiroth) revolved around videogame music. So, I spent the whole morning writing my response. The rule was, 1 fucking song per franchise. That made it hard, but, here is my list:

10. The Chrono Trigger Theme - Chrono Trigger: Much like the theme to The Legend Of Zelda, this song prepares you for an awe-inspiring adventure that you will remember on your death bed. This piece of music made you want to pick up your sword along with your best frog buddy, jump into a time portal, and hack and slash you way to becoming the Hero of Time. Anything short of this song, and the adventure would have fallen flat on its face.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lIO1sajyx_o

9. Lost Painting - Castlevania: Symphony Of The Night: Many people will pick "Bloody Tears" or "Vampire Killer". While those are great choices, the Castlevania vote should go to "Lost Painting". This haunting and stunningly beautiful track highlighted this game, which was already full of memorable songs. It almost brings you into a gothic world of mysticism and wonder, which is perfect for a game like Symphony of the Night.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1lm36RIydUw

8. The Max Payne Theme - Max Payne: This song is overlooked far too much. This track is absolutely iconic. It perfectly brings you into the dark, seedy under realm that is the world of Max Payne. When you first hear it as the game kicks up, you know exactly what's in store for you. The piece has a kind of power and darkness to it that is unmatched, and unrivaled in shooting games. One can oly hope that it will be featured in the Mark Wahlberg movie.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gRuReVCFOY0&feature=related

7. Techno Syndrome - Mortal Kombat: This song was EVERYWHERE in the mid-90's. It's also the only song for a videogame that this writer has ever heard on commercial radio! While I'm not sure if this can be included as it actually wasn't featured in the game, it should be at least honorably mentioned for its impact on gamer culture. It helped a generation of gamers get into techno music, and was the theme song for millions of fighting game fans throughout the country. When you heard this song, one thing went through your mind: It's time to tear shit up!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iTWdm6RrpVE

6. Still Alive - Portal: This song is a hit. Not doubting that. No debating that. Its hilarious lyrics and addicting guitar licks have helped one of the best and most original puzzle games ever become one of the biggest nonsensical fads ever in gaming culture. Not to mention playing this song on Rock Band at a party full of nerds will inspire one of the best sing-a-longs you'll ever have.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y6ljFaKRTrI&feature=related

5. The Legend Of Zelda Theme - The Legend Of Zelda: The best videogame songs induce a feeling upon you. They immerse you in the experience of the game and capture a feel that goes beyond the gameplay. And no other song gets you ready for adventure more than the Legend of Zelda Theme. As soon as you hear that song, you are ready to do nothing less than save the world! This was the beginning of videogame music being moved into a more cinematic direction, and STILL remains as one of the most epic themes of all time.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vTkHwUocbA0

4. 47 Makes A Decision - Hitman 2: Silent Assassin: This soundtrack established Jesper Kyd as one of the forerunners in videogame music composure. Every single track is a sweeping orchestral powerhouse that induces goosebumps to the listener. The best track however, is the masterpiece "47 Makes A Decision". When you first here this, you know you are about to embark on a quest for revenge that will leave nothing but bodies and blood in its wake. This song makes you, more than any other song in game history, ready to kick major ass.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kTi6Dp0zWh0

3. The Super Mario Brothers Theme - Super Mario Brothers: I am not a fan of Mario, but even I have to admit that this song is catchy. Hell, almost everyone in the WORLD knows it, and I know of no there videogame song that can hold that distinction. Admit it, you're playing it in your head right now aren't you?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b7dX7kZlzUY

2. The Doomsday Zone - Sonic & Knuckles: Sonic The Hedgehog 3: For the 4th and final (real) time on the Genesis, you engage in a game-ending battle with Robotnick. However this time, you truly know the fate of the world hangs in the balance. You just destroyed the Death Egg once and for all, but now Robotnick is making off with the Master Emerald. In an effort to stop them, you harness the power of the Chaos Emeralds and take pursuit. What follows is the most adrenaline inducing track ever. The Doomsday Zone's musical track brought me back to replay that stage time and time again in youth, because the music itself was just so amazing. It was the perfect track for your final fight with Robotnick, and gets your heart racing with its high tempo, amazing riffs, and furious use of 16-bit music galore!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7FAffWEmB3I

1. One Winged Angel - Final Fantasy VII: Final Fantasy VII is one of the most celebrated games of all time. In many instances, the series as a whole is the videogame world's Star Wars. And just like Star Wars, the music is half of the experience. Nobuo Uematsu took videogame composure to a new level and re-established the precedent for what to expect from a videogame soundtrack. While almost every track is memorable, one track completely stole the show. It is the end of the game, the world has been plummeted into chaos and is on the brink of destruction. You and your motley crew of heroes battle your way to the center of the planet in an attempt to save it. At the end, you are met with screeching violins inspired by the legendary Jimi Hendrix's "Purple Haze" and come face to face with the greatest videogame villain of all time. The build up crashes into an absolute fury of orchestral thunder and the cries of a choir chanting the very name of your ultimate adversary. There has never been another piece of music in all of videogames that have epitomized the word "epic" as has "One Winged Angel".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t7wJ8pE2qKU

Honorable mention. The Sons Of Liberty - Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons Of Liberty: I'm really sorry there could only be 10, but Still Alive had to be included for its impact on gaming culture, and the Mario theme for its impact on WORLD culture. Unfortunately this track had to be edged out... but it really shouldn't be. It's awe inspiring, literally. With its mix of electronic elements, heroic orchestral anthems, and chilling choirs, its seriously an all around perfect videogame theme. It just got edged out because I already had so many heroic anthems on here, and because I was disappointed that it was not featured in MGS3, though it was alluded to at the end (I don't know if its in MGS4, but I refuse to buy a PS4 so it may be a looooong time before I find out for myself). However, this is a song to be remembered, and is definitely at least worth a mention.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ObNCrxgFCUo

Now I'm wondering, what's your top 10?

-Roger

So Matt took me to the mall the other day to go clothes shopping for the Versailles tour. Now, I haven't done this in years. Other than a few new t-shirts here and there, I haven't done any significant clothes shopping since high school. As soon as we got there though, pretty much what I feared was confirmed. The fashion trends I loved in high school are dead. Wide leg jeans, club shirts, fish nets, long coats, and just over all baggy clothing are dead. It has been replaced with... almost the polar opposite: skin tight jeans, medium to small sized brand name and designer T-shirts, and hoodies. As a result, I walked away with almost nothing. Yeah, I was able to find baggy clothes at wigger and maternity stores, and some ridiculously over priced bondage pants at Hot Topic... so needless to say I walked away with a Mortal Kombat t-shirt, a normal fitting pair of jeans, and 1 cheap-ass pair of sneakers. Maybe I should stop living in the past... but today's fasion trends really suck dick.

Journey's doesn't even carry my Heely's anymore.

I know I haven't posted in a few days. I will get back to it, I promise... but 2 days ago, I got fed-up and bought Guitar Hero III for PC. Ever since, I have been moding the hell out of it with custom songs. Last night, I found out how to make my own custom songs. So... coming soon... J-Rock Guitar Hero! My first song: BLOOD - Morphine!

-Roger

Just before my 10th grade year ended, I had a big falling out with the friend that inspired the first Roger's Mix. However, we wound up having our Political Science class together the next year. At first, I was just letting bygones be bygones, but we wound up being on friendly terms again. When we did, he kept going on about a program called Kazaa and all of the hilarious stuff he was finding on it, more specifically AMV's (a DBZ clip where the dubbed over the "WAZZZZUP" commercial). I wasn't much for file sharing then, but after hearing all about this content before there ever was a Youtube, I had to give it a shot. What I found was not only funny AMV's, but music I was never exposed to in the form of videogame remixes, soundbites, and, especially, orchestral renditions. And when I finally got my own CD burner, it was time to take Roger's Mix to a new level.

January 2002 - Paint It Black: Roger's Mix IV

Kazaa opened up nearly infinite possibilities for the mix albums now. I was no longer limited to what I had already on CD. I could now go out and find the music I wanted to really put on the CD, as well as accidentally come across some tracks I never even new existed. Simply typing in words like "videogame remix" yielded a plethora of musical choices for the mixes now. All I had to do was choose the ones that best fit the album. As mentioned before, the driving force of this album was my discovery of fully orchestrated renditions of videogame songs, specifically from the Orchestral Game Concert series. This were beautifully done, professionally scored, adaptations of many of Nintendo's greatest musical pieces, mainly from the 16-bit era (God I miss ye).

Due to the amount of material I had for this, and all of the bases I wanted to cover, I made this mix a double album. With no real theme behind it, it kinda returned to the feeling of the first one, Though I experimented a bit more with giving the songs of the mix a natural flow. The first disc did this well, but the second disc really feels like 2 parts, with one hard transition in the middle. I chose the Rolling Stones' Paint It Black as the title track for the album coz it's the most sinister song ever, and kinda fit my personality during that time of highschool. The classic rock vibe continues, as even Bitter Sweet Symphony is a pseudo Rolling Stones cover. The symphonic work soon dominates the remainder of the CD, with a quick glimpse of what's to come in Disc 2 with Moby's version of the James Bond Theme.

The second CD though quickly picks up where Roger's Mix 2 left off (RM3 was completely devoid of humor) with a clip from the Jerky Boys, which was probably their best clip ever. The entire first half of the second CD was completely dedicated to humor, with the final track of the first half being labeled as "Nirvana! - Enter Sandman". This was indeed the name of the file, but when i downloaded it, it was actually Wesley Willis - Suck my Dog's Dick. Kazaa users were famous for these RickRoll-type antics. I even renamed a file "Dragon Ball Z - Bulma's Theme" which was actually Eddie Murphy's Party All The Time. The second half contained a mix of actual videogame song, remixes, and live band renditions, closing the album with The Vines' cover of Paint It Black. The art work was a pic of Frog from Chrono Trigger looking at Magus's Castle with a black and white color scheme for Disc 1, and Max Payne shooting directly at you for Disc 2.

Paint It Black: Roger's Mix IV wound up being the most popular with the kids around school out of any of the mixes. I guess that was due to it having a little something for everyone. It was a great gateway for the things to come.

Tracklist:
Disc 1
01. The Rolling Stones - Paint It Black
02. Mick Jagger - God Gave Me Everything i Wanted
03. The Verve - Bittersweet Symphony
04. Blue Oyster Cult - Don't Fear The Reaper
05. Aerosmith - Dream On
06. Castlevania - Bloody Tears (Metal mix)
07. Tokyo Symphony Orchestra - Theme of Chrono Trigger
08. Tokyo City Philharmonic Orchestra - Theme of Samus Aran, Galactic Warrior, Big Boss BGM, Ending
09. Tokyo City Philharmonic Orchestra - The Legend Of Zelda Theme
10. Tokyo City Philharmonic Orchestra - Medley (Super Mario Bros.)
11. Tokyo City Philharmonic Orchestra - Star Fox Theme
12. London Philharmonic Orchestra - Time (as made famous by Pink Floyd)
13. Nobuo Uematsu - Aeris Theme (Piano rendition)
14. Beethoven - The Moonlight Sonota
15. Moby - The James Bond Theme

Disc 2
01. The Jerky Boys - Terrorist Pizza
02. The Minutemen - Corona
03. CKy - Santa's Coming
04. Unknown Author - Vegeta's Gay
05. Unknown Author - Resident Evil Sex Scene
06. System Of A Down - The Legend Of Zelda
07. CKy - Fat Fuck
08. Nirvana! - Enter Sandman (Wesley Willis - Suck My Dog's Dick)
09. Star Fox - Corneria (Techno Remix)
10. Castlevania: Symphony Of The Night - Lost Painting
11. Unknown Author - Lost Painting (Piano rendition)
12. Unknown Author - Mega Man 2 Main Title (Rave Remix)
13. The Minibosses - Metroid
14. Kimmo Kajasto - The Max Payne Theme
15. The Vines - Paint It Black

This one came about in the very beginning of summer break, on the way back from a trip to Key West. The van we were traveling in had a separate tape deck in the back that you could plug headphones into. So, I was back there listening to some random tapes and mix tapes, as well as my portable CD player, when some of the songs I was listening to reminded me of characters from Sonic The Hedgehog, my favorite video game mascot and childhood icon. I remembered the home made Gundam soundtrack my friend Kristen made, and wanted to do something similar for Sonic. As soon as I got home, Roger’s Mix 3: The Sonic The Hedgehog Mix was put together.

The tape version was similar to Roger’s Mix in that it was a mix of music from other videogames’ music, popular songs, and techno mixes. I put together the mix tape as a soundtrack, not labeling songs by their true title, but rather where I wanted them in the Sonic universe (Green Hill Zone, Tails’ Theme, ect). Most of this was due to the fact that, at the time, I had no actual Sonic tunes on CD, and almost wanted to make believe I could carry around Sonic music with me. The mix tape even made references to the Saturday Morning cartoon, as characters like Bunny and Sally had theme songs representing them.

Once again though, with the acquisition of a CD burner in January of 2002, the mix was overhauled. This was the first of the mix tape Roger’s Mixes that I remade onto CD. The biggest reason for this was my discovery of one of the best websites on the net: www.ocremix.org. Basically, this website is a place for amateur musicians to remake or remix videogame songs, and listeners could download their creations for free. Once I discovered this site, and its plethora of Sonic tunes, I had to remake RM3. I decided that for the CD's cover art, I would use the ever enigmatic, but possibly coolest videogame cover art ever, the box art from Sonic & Knuckles.

This version had much more focus on the games, and I included as many Sonic tunes as I could. I did however retain some of the personal character themes, and stages from the mix tape. Showing the times a bit, Limp Bizkit’s My Way represented Knuckles. Luckily, though, this is one of maybe 3 of their songs I can still listen to this day and enjoy. One big hit with the people I handed these out to was Robotnik (now known as Eggman)’s theme. It was a track from the spiritual sequel to Twisted Metal 2, Rogue Trip: Vacation 2012 called “Big Daddy”, which made Robotnik seem like some gangsta pimp. I think it was actually the only real rap song to appear on any Roger’s Mix too.

One track that kinda “WTF”ed some people was my choice to have Linkin Park’s In The End as the ending theme to Sonic Adventure 2. I guess I did that because I was all emo that it was the last game to ever appear on a Sega system… which also had me a bit bitter. At the time, I was stretching the lyrics to be from Sonic and directed to the videogame fanbase for abandoning Dreamcast, which had crazy, original, fun games, for the PS2 (which had a very very lame launch series of games) out of mere name recognition, there-by killing Sega.

This mix actually ranks in my top 3 favorites. Its tracks I still listen to, to this day. Not only that, but it also spawned what became my online-gaming battle anthem (especially during my Return To Castle Wolfenstein days), Super Sonic [Brainbug Remix]. It’s the track I play every year at the Temple of Sephiroth in December, asking the fanbase if they know who the artist is. It also was one of the first personal mixes I made, as Sonic is really special to me, and is pretty much the inspiration for everything I’m doing right now.

Tracklist (Original Mix Tape)
Unknown

Tracklist (CD Re-vision)
01. Sonic The Hedgehog - Main Theme (Super Sonic Dance Attack Remix)
02. Sonic CD - Sonic Boom
03. Sonic Adventure 2 - City Escape (Jet Moto 2 - Track 2)
04. Knuckles Theme (Limp Bizkit - My Way)
05. Razed In Black - Open Your Heart (remix)
06. Sonic & Knuckles - Flying Battery Zone (Jivemaster - rAAw Battery)
07. Unknown Author - Super Sonic [Brainbug Remix]
08. Tails Theme (The Mighty Mighty Bostons - Rascal King (live))
09. Sonic Adventure - Speed Highway (Motorhead - Ace of Spades)
10. Sonic The Hedgehog - Scrap Brain Zone (Jivemaster - Particle Brain)
11. Sonic The Hedgehog 3 - Bonus Level (McVaffe - LatinSphere)
12. Robotnick Theme (Rouge Trip - Big Daddy)
13. Sonic The Hedgehog 3 - Ice Cap Zone (McVaffe - Icecapped)
14. Sonic The Hedgehog 2 - The Marble Garden (remix)
15. Sonic The Hedgehog 2 - Ending Theme (Remix)
16. Sonic The Hedgehog 3 - Ending Theme (Jivemaster - Tight Finale)
17. Sonic Adventure 2 - Ending Theme (Linkin Park - In the End)
18. Sonic Theme (Crush 40 - Open Your Heart)

May 2001, May 2002 - Roger's Mix Version 2.0: Funny Fucking Special Edition

This one is a tragedy of sorts in that... well... it doesn't exist anymore.

This one came around soon after the first one, as I started to accumulate some comedy material (Adam Sandler, The Jerky Boys, ect). I was itching to make another mix tape, so, after compiling some of the comedy material, and some random funny songs I had, I made Roger's Mix Version 2.0: Funny Fuck Edition.

Once again, I remade the mix as a CD and renamed it Roger's Mix Version 2.0: Funny Fucking Special Edition. However, I almost completely over hauled it. Most of the song portions were deleted as the power of internet exposed me to tons of comedic skits and sound bites. The dominate presence on this album was my discovery of Arnold Schwarzenegger prank calls as the CD featured 4, and even had Arnold as the cover art. It wound up being a great CD to have around the lunch table to hand the headphones off to random kids and be like "Hear this!".

The tragedy is in that the CD art, after time, ripped the top side of the CD off... and I didn't have the CD backed up on my hard drive. While I do have some of the tracks, a good majority of them are now forgotten to me.

This did set a few precedents though. This was the first mix that I distributed amongst the kids at school. My closest friend Mike, though, was annoyed as I took the cow skit from Adam Sandler's "What The Hell Happened To Me", and chopped it up so that portions of it appeared in between every few tracks. In the CD version though, I left the track uncut, which my friend liked better, as it was easier to skip over.

This was also the first CD to have a theme to it, something I would use to great extent in future editions of the series. While the theme didn't translate well in the original mix tape (it contained some techno oriented tracks that were more dance oriented than comedic), the CD version, highlighted by the Arnold pranks, had many people dying from laughter from start to finish.

Tracklist (Original Mix Tape)
Unknown

Tracklist (CD Special Edition Re-Release)
Unknown
Possible Inclusions Are:
Fatboy Slim - Heaven
Adam Sandler - Joining the Cult
Arnold Calls Some Guy's Mom
Star Wars Gangstah Rap
Adam Sandler - The Adventures Of The Cow
Arnold Calls Mrs. Cleo
Stoned On Sesame Street
Adam Sandler - Memory Lane
Arnold Calls A Drunk Guy
Arnold Calls A Drunk Guy Again

Recently (and by recently, I mean the past few months), I've been really missing the weirdest thing, something that I thought I would never miss... highschool. More specifically the middle 2 years. Why? I hated highschool. I considered it a waste of my time, and still do now. So, now why am I missing it so much? I have a theory. I think thats because those were the years where all of this pent up creativity that I've had for years finally started to make its way out.

Anyway, the other night I left my TV on while I fell asleep. As I was sleeping, I was awaken by some very familiar... jazzy sounds... followed by dialog I almost know by heart. Cowboy Bebop was on. And since then, I got really nostalgic for a specific part of highschool.

The mix CDs I was making and distributing around school (mainly to friends). I think I talked about 'em before on here, but never in great detail. A friend of mine in 10th grade that I idolized (a little too much, who turned out to be a fucking hack) made a mix CD part way through 10th grade with some killer anime songs and videogame remixes on it (especially from Street Fighter 2). I really liked it as it brought out the nerd in me, and back then, anime was only beginning to become sociably acceptable (after the explosion of POKEMAN and Toonami), and listening to videogame tunes wasn't common (though I had been secretly doing it for years, but I'll explain that later). After he made a second one, I decided I had to start making my own, which was the beginning of several series of mix CDs that I started making. I guess I'll do this in a list form.

May 2001, October 2002: Roger's Mix - This one was the first, and was pretty similar to what my friend was doing at the time. Just a mix of various videogame and anime tracks that I threw together for my own benefit, not really to distribute it (though I did later when I re-released it). However, this was orginally a mix tape, not a CD. I didn't have a burner back then, so I used the tape deck on my boombox to record from CDs I already had.

I mainly took tracks from the games I had at the time. See, back then, Playstation and Saturn games sometimes had their soundtrack available on disc, so that all you had to do was throw them in a CD player. I mainly took tracks from 2 of my favorite videogame soundtracks ever: Jet Moto, and Alien Trilogy. I also added tracks from a homemade Gundam Wing soundtrack a friend of mine made, and tracks from the other friend's mix who was the inspiration for the disc. If I remember right, I did make a copy for that friend, and he commented that he liked how I used some of his tracks.

About a year and a half later (October 2002), after I had a CD burner, I remade it into a CD and added additional tracks (packaged it as a special edition! lol)... though most of the added tracks were radio-played songs. I dunno why I did that, probably just because I liked them, or felt they went with the flow, but I didn't like throwing in songs people knew well, and only did it if I felt it fit the flow or theme. Unfortunately, this practice became common later on, especially in the last Roger's Mix, but I'll talk more about that later. I also took out the tracks from Air Combat because I didn't have the disc anymore and couldn't find the songs anywhere. Another thing added was CD art... and I didn't like the art on this too much. It's just a blurred pic of me in a dark room smiling. I was more creative with the other releases. The last thing added was a short intro track with me saying "This is it... the very beginning... It all starts here." Reason for that? I was trying to be artsy-fartsy about the whole thing and impress a girl.

Tracklist (Original Mix Tape)
1. Alien Trilogy - Xenophobia
2. Apoptygma Berzerk - Fade To Black
3. Gundam Wing (Friend's homemade soundtrack) - Night Of Fire
4. Jet Moto - Ride On
5. Air Combat - Track 2
6. Gundam Wing (Friend's homemade soundtrack) - Heero's Dream
7. Air Combat - Track 5
8. Alien Trilogy - Respirator
9. Street Fighter 2 - Guile's Stage (Live Band Remix)
10. Street Fighter 2 - Ryu's Stage (Live Band Remix)
11. Megadeth - Duke Nukem Theme
12. Dick Dale & Stevie Ray Vaughn - Pipeline
13. Green Day - Last Ride In
14. The Jerky Boys - Bad Tomatoes
15. Primus - Tommy The Cat
16. AC/DC - The Jack
17. Metallica - Orion

Tracklist (CD Special Edition Re-release)
1. The Beginning (Intro Track)
2. Alien Trilogy - Xenophobia
3. Apoptygma Berzerk - Fade To Black
4. Gundam Wing (Friend's homemade soundtrack) - Night Of Fire
5. Jet Moto - Ride On
6. Gundam Wing (Friend's homemade soundtrack) - Heero's Dream
7. Jet Moto - Epic
8. Alien Trilogy - Respirator
9. Street Fighter 2 - Guile's Stage (Live Band Remix)
10. Megadeth - Duke Nukem Theme
11. Street Fighter 2 - Ryu's Stage (Live Band Remix)
12. Dick Dale & Stevie Ray Vaughn - Pipeline
13. Green Day - Last Ride In
14. The Jerky Boys - Bad Tomatoes
15. Primus - Tommy The Cat
16. AC/DC - The Jack
17. Filter - Take A Picture
18. Coldplay - Trouble
19. Metallica - Orion

Next post - Roger's Mix 2.0: Funny Fucking Special Edition

I'm starting to wonder if I'm stretching myself too thin. There's so much stuff I want to do, but I'm starting to fear if I have enough time. Right now, I'm producing 3 radio shows, managing the Internet Radio network, managing 5 bands (1 most people don't know about yet), working on 6 tours, have a secret project that I'm working on, a movie script in the works (Sailor Moon), video projects that need to be finished (Mah Balls, Anime USA 2), and my upcoming manga project.... and I still wanna make PV's for my bands. My work schedule is not suffering yet, the only thing that's really getting in the way is my day job... but I'm worried it may one day. With my religious conflictions now a days, I have been trying to live my life as if it's the only one I have. I don't wanna be on my death bed saying "Damnit, I wanted to do that and never did...".

So, after being encouraged by just about everyone I know, I put Rob Zombie's Halloween on my Netflix list. I got it yesterday and watched it this morning. And honestly.... I'm a bit disappointed.

What everyone was telling was this is the story of Michael, not the teenage bimbos he's killing. A metal analysis of a serial killer that one of my close buddies told me was even better than the original. I never saw any of the other films as I'm not much for mindless slasher flicks, but this sounded up my ally. And well, everyone was right... kinda. The first 40 minutes of the film are fucking amazing. It is exactly what everyone was telling me it was and I was getting deeply engrossed by it. When Michael kills, its written so well that it almost feels justified. I just about rooted for him. And the time he spends in the mental ward is just amazing, as it dives further into his mind. I was really loving it... until he broke free.

Then the film just boiled down to what I imagine all of the others are like: teenage skanks, tits, and gore. All character development and analysis are thrown completely out of the window as the film becomes just another slasher film. The story fails to advance beyond that point as it becomes blood bath after blood bath without rhyme or reason. It was almost like the first part of the film was nothing more than a reason to get to the mindless killing. I was hoping to see more of an exploration into the mind of Michael, some character development, SOMETHING! I didn't even feel sympathy for the people he was killing. If this was the only the last act of the film, it would have felt better... but instead it was almost 3/4 of the entire film.

I went into this expecting something similar (though not to the caliber of) Silence of the Lambs. Instead, I got a taste of that, then exactly why I wasn't interested in the Halloween films to begin with. Maybe I set the bar to high? I dunno.

-Roger

Last night, I had a very frustrating night at work. I got lost on a run and wasted a ton of gas, and had 3 customers flat out stiff me (they didn't tip). I hate it when they are all like "thank you!" like not giving me a dime is all fucking OK. There was this one couple that I had to drive to the furthest extreme of our map to deliver to, who just put a slash through the tip section of their credit card receipt, handed it back to me and were all smiles and like "thank you very much!". I just handled it the same way I always do when this happens, avoid eye contact and give them the silent treatment. One of these days though, I'm gonna say what I really wanna say: "Thanx?! You got a fuck of a way of showing it! I come all the way up here to fucking Ardmore at 3 fucking 20 a gallon, and you have the fucking audacity to put a slash on the fucking tip and say 'thanx'?! How about 'thank you for helping to ensuring me that I'll never be able to move out of my grandfather's place stuck at this low paying job that I'm only doing because they are flexible with what I really wanna do, which is actually taking even more money from me than I can afford'. 'Thanx a lot for basically exploiting my gas tank while you ass guzzling dumb fucks can sit here lazily in your home with your fucking Blu Ray player and Hi-Def TV'. Fuck this shit. I'm moving to Canada. At least I can get free health care there."

-Roger

So, I'm sitting here in my empty home in Ocean City. The summer's over and starting last Tuesday, the town started going into ghost town mode. Thats when I like it here the best, because my section of town is almost entirely empty. I haven't left the house much since I left my job. Mostly been doing TR work, and catching up on some gaming and movies. I'm not working as much as I should be though. I gotta refocus myself.

Yes, I haven't written in this all summer. Those of you close to me probably know why. Other than my professional life, this summer didn't go so well. I got laid off from 2 jobs, one that I was at for 8 years, the other I only worked for 4 days until I was let go for a variety of bullshit reasons, including "your hair is too long", and was unemployed for a month, which left me in financial ruins. To make matters worse, the job I went on to a month later was 7 days a week, 10 hours a day (a private contractor job), and I barely made a dime. I made more money at the first job i ever had than at this. The only reason I've been able to keep TR alive with all of is costs, as well, as my own personal bills (i.e. car insurance), is through the generosity of my father, grandfather, and the boss at my third job, who gave me several breaks.

There's many other factors that made this a not-so-great summer, but I don't wanna get into those. Except the kittens... Just before the Candy tour, my cat had 5 kittens. My grandfather doesnt like animals, so I had to find a home for all 6 cats. My father accepted foster care of my cat, and we found homes for 3 of the kittens. However, with the other two, we found several potential takers. But each time, when I followed up, they changed their mind (a couple right when me and the cat were on their front door step). So, it got to the point where I had to take them to Jersey with me. I hid them for the first week, then decided to tell my grandfather about it, leading him to think I already had a home for the (at the time, I kinda thought I did). He didn't hit the roof like I thought he would, but he did say he wanted them out ASAP. Then I started my job, and used that as an excuse as I continued my search for their home.

However, the days and weeks dragged on, and I started to feel more and more like shit. But just having these kittens around cheered me up a bit. I'd find myself coming home from work, opening the front door with a smile on my face, saying "Where's my babies?!" and they'd come hopping up, purring, and rubbing up against my leg. They brought some light to my dim life, and some company as my grandfather only came down 2 or 3 days a week, and would even skip some weeks. And before you know it, I accidentally named them. These guys really kept me alive.

Now the summer's over, my summer job is done, and I need to get back to PA to start a new job ASAP. However, I can't go back until these guys get a home, and I will do that. I'm not putting the in the SPCA. I don't want them to rot in some cage.... and I don't want them to be separated.

If I could, I'd stay down here year round. But my grandfather only keeps the place open to November, and there's no point in getting a job now that I'm just gonna quit in a month and a half when the job market is open now. I need to find a day time job that I can get flexible hours with, and keep it until June. I can do that now. I dunno if I can do that in November... so essentially I need to be out of here in a week to have any hope of getting a decent job, or paying the bills next month.

Besides, I like it down here like this. It's quiet, cool, by the ocean, and I have a house to myself. Yeah, I get lonely once in a while, but more often than not, I enjoy my solitude. My spirits are starting to pick up a bit now that the summer's over.

Never thought I'd say that.

But the only thing left to do is to get these kittens a good home. I've resorted to the last resort of posting bulletins on Myspace. No luck so far. I hope the offer reaches someone who can take good care of them.

But yeah, that's my summer in a nutshell. I avoided writing in here during the entirety of it so I wouldn't sound even more pathetic. But I have high hopes for the future.

Don't worry, as long as I find the kittens a home, I'm not bummed any more.

-Roger